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One deserves to be written about

One might think that one's friends would be happy about one's accomplishments, especially the so called best friends. But that is not always the case. Why does it happen? Maybe one's best friend is not really that connected with one in the way one thought they were. One might be disappointed. One might be sad. One might even be angry, but one might ignore if one feels angry at one's friend for not supporting one the way that a best friend should do, or if one feels angry with oneself because one should never expect anything from anyone, but one did, and now, on top of angry, one might feel stupid, used and/or unworthy.



I miss my lighthouse, I feel a little lost.
Where am I supposed to go? What am I supposed to do?
My heart doesn't feel strong, its as if it refuses to beat anymore.
What happened?
When did It get so bad?

I thought I was doing fine... what the fuck is wrong?


¡Light it up!

Sometimes I don't see the point...
but you do it anyway, 'cause that's the way it goes.
It can be exhausting, yeah, don't quit though...
¡Light it up!



I don’t think we are building our future. I think we are building our life, because future does not exist, only in our minds.


Random thoughts

I wonder if he already knows how to play with your clit or if you taught him.


Does love change?

I used to think she was the most beautiful woman in the whole world, now when I look at her -or a picture of her- I smile, I don’t see her like that anymore. She stopped being everything, the reason I breathed, I cried, I laughed, I lived, I loved and even wanted to die sometimes…
Love goes away, that’s for sure.
Or does it change? I still love her, but not in the same way
I see her as a regular hot girl now, not as a goddess. I like her, but as my friend, not as I used to like her.


Rise and fly!

 Fly, for there are wings under your skin.

Look at the sky, smile and rise above the ground.

There are colors everywhere, just open your eyes and prepare your mind to see them.

Chase whatever makes you smile. You know you’re not like everybody else, you were not born to be caged.

You keep fighting to live an extraordinary life, you deserve nothing but it.

A life full of happiness, meaning, breathtaking moments, strength, joy. You got joy running through your veins all the time, just let it flow and inspire your actions.

Life is not worth living in sadness or any kind of negative feeling, neither negative thoughts are worth having. What is the point? Move on, learn from the stuff that happens and go back quickly to the smiling human being you are meant to be. Bitter people suck, refuse to become one of those annoying ones. Take care of your thoughts because that is where feelings are born.

Fight against yourself (and your weird tendencies) and the world to live the life you truly want to live, it’s worth the effort. Just picture it in your mind, it draws a smile in your face immediately, doesn’t it?

Fly, you are strong enough to do it, go ahead and jump fearless (and if you feel fear, punch it in the face, it’s just a son of a bitch designed to protect your brain and keep it resting).

Your brain doesn’t know what’s best for you, show him that a life of fulfilled dreams is a better one for both of you, show him and make him shut the fuck up.

Rise above issues, dramas, bullshit, excuses, negative people, ungrateful people, pain, violence, sorrow and everything that may hurt you. Who knows for how long you’re gonna live, and you better jump to your purpose and die with passion, so when you pass away you get to be remembered as a happy, crazy and free woman who left an impressive mark behind her.


When I saw this blog had a bunch of visitors from Ireland

IRELAND? I fucking love Ireland. It's like a fairy tale, rock'n roll, full of great beer place...

I have the best memories of Ireland, even the part where I almost got deported back to Spain is an awesome story...


Chaotic and painful storm

Everyday I wake up thinking that maybe this nightmare is over, that he's not gone and I'm still gonna be able to hug him, kiss him, play with him, caress him... No, this fucking nightmare isn't over, as soon as I realize that, I start crying...
Cómo quitarme este desespero que siento, cómo hacer para que cada minuto que estoy donde él debería estar y no está no sienta ganas de matarme o de romperme en llanto? La puta madre que parió al hijodelastresmilputas que decidió que él se debía ir y no vivir 100 años para que nunca tuviéramos que sentir esta mierda que crece y crece, y que parece que se está llevando todo lo bueno que queda como si fuera un hoyo negro.
Dolor, tristeza, angustia, desesperación, desasosiego, aburrición, esto no tiene nombre.
Mi sonrisa se la llevaron el miércoles cuando me llamaron a decirme que había muerto el rey y desde entonces no me provoca ni buscarla, que se haya ido con él, que se haya ido a la estrella donde reside ahora, que le haga compañía y que regrese el día que lo sienta.
No es justo y la injusticia me saca de quicio. Es una buena forma de verlo, me he desquiciado. It's pretty accurate.

Mi cerebro está funcionando a velocidades turbo, en inglés y en español me salen palabras a borbotones, quejas y reniegos principalmente, aunque también unas pequeñas dosis de calma, tal vez intentando darle forma a algo a lo cual me pueda aferrar como un salvavidas y que me permita sacarme a mi misma de esta.

Amor puro, amor duro, amor eterno. Desde siempre y hasta siempre. Yo nunca prometo amor eterno, pero él sabía que de mi lo tendría sin necesidad de promesas, era lo merecido, lo justo, lo mínimo que podría darle.
Tantos momentos, esto es una locura, cómo puede esto terminar? Estafa, el Universo tiene una falla desde mi egoísmo, la veo claramente y sólo cuando vuelva a sentar al ego atrás dejaré de verla como tal. Tanto dolor me lo puso al lado, no sé más, no me interesa saber más.
Sólo me interesa que se acabe esta pesadilla de mierda, que me despierte y él siga a mi lado, que la despedida haya sido sólo una mala pasada.
La que vive en calma, en Tranquilandia, en reflexión y meditación la desmayaron, dejándome a la brava, la llorona, la depresiva, la que es capaz de chocar su mini cooper contra un muro porque no le ve problema a hacerlo, la que es capaz de mandar a cualquiera a la mierda porque la simple rabia que le da tener que aprender a vivir sin el rey le da ese poder, porque si aprende a vivir sin el rey es capaz de vivir sin cualquiera. Esta es difícil de tratar, esta está furiosa.
Universe, with all due respect, you can kiss my ass right now, how the fuck could you take him away?
Desquiciada, tal cual. This is one hell of a storm.
Fuck everything, I'm outta here.


Huyendo de ese barco

Que nada te quite la tranquilidad, que nadie te quite la tranquilidad.
Todo pasa, el tiempo es amigo del olvido y eventualmente te lo presenta.
Fuck it, I'm not up for this shit.


Let's do this General Manager thingy

This is fun...
It's just about not screwing up like the older son and overcome what the second daughter has done.
Easy, right?
I'm up for the mission, I can do this. I can beat this quest ass and take it to another level.
May the Universe give me peace, wisdom and patience, all of them in the right amounts so I don't kill anybody while I fulfill my new assignment.


I was just wondering

What do you feel when you read me?


Among other things ;)

I'm happy... I get to play with letters all day long.


Just thinking...

There are so many stupid people on Earth right now that I'm amazed how the rest of us can handle any situation peacefully at all.

I remember that last year my mother's son called me and my sister thieves, he even said he could sue us. I laughed, off course, but deep inside all I wanted to do was to punch his face and knock him out. I don't care if he was on a ton of cocaine or not, he destroyed something that day because of his stupidity. A few months later he called her trying to pretend that everything was fine, but no fucking way, you cannot disrespect people and then act as if nothing happened, you know what? Fuck off.

I also remember that I used to have a “friend" who thought it was a good idea to threaten to sue me, having nothing to blame me for, at all. I still laugh my ass off about that because later she tried to make contact with me, also pretending like she hadn't fucked it up. She makes me sick, stupid people make me sick. 

Sometimes you just feel like grabbing some people's head and kick it with your knee, you know? 
I don't think I'm a terrible person, but damn! 

And they are not the only ones who keep threatening to sue us, what a bunch of suckers.

Now, how about when someone threatens to sue you and at the same time asks for favors? Those are the greatest of them all, I mean they should really receive a prize for being the biggest assholes alive! 

There's this guy who was thinking about suing us while we were magnificently doing something that he was supposed to be doing, and that's how he "pays" us, ¿ah? Man, he brings the worst out of me, I swear I could kick his motherfucking ass if I wasn't a non violence kinda girl. He deserves it, everyone who tries to bring you down just for their pleasure deserves to get kicked in the balls.

I hope my lawyer doesn’t read this because I’m gonna get in a liiiiittle trouble, but hey, I had to get it out of my system.



You will always be my Juliet, my first love of that kind, the impossible one. 
"You said, "I love you like the stars above, I love you till I die"" Damn! The Killers said it so marvelously well!


Just a thought

Once upon a time I loved you more than anything in the world, I don't think you realize that.
I would have lost everything to give it to you.
I lost myself attached to your body every time we hugged. For instance I remember when we hugged in Barcelona, right on the street, it felt like we did it for ages, and I still remember the feeling, our tears because we were going to say goodbye soon, our hearts pumping so loud, I wouldn't wanted to be anywhere else in the world but there, giving each other our souls forever. I loved you so much right in that moment that all I cared about was that moment itself, not the cars or the people around us. The world could've fall apart right there and I would've died happy. 
That's how much I loved you...


Just a little tip

 Oh! My friend, you should know... In the end, I'll always get the girl.



Hold me in your arms until there's nothing left.


Just for you

I don't write because I want to remember but because I want to let go

Let go your hand, let go the sparkles that make my eyes shine
Let go the bittersweetness, let go my pumping heart
Let go your distant love, let go your beautiful smile

Set me free, let me fly, high to the perfect sky
Let my spirit join my heart, let me feel  alive

I can't fix the past, I can only try to live my life
I can't win you back, I can only reach for the diamonds in the sky.


Let's go

Let’s ride to the sky, let’s get high as a kite, cause if I reach the sky maybe I can see her again.

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